What is the most challenging thing or event in any relationship? What destroys more partnerships, marriage, new relationships etc? This is the old age question that most people ask me when wanting and desiring to take their relationship to a level 3 to 4 love plate forms.
What is a level 3 or 4 love? Is it possible for everyone to have this level of love and are all of us programmed this way?
If we can look at our relationships as a metaphor for a moment and explain how this love game works them we can build a solid structure to accommodate almost all of these simple questions that you need answering. When I found out about level 3 to 4 love there was a deep desire within me to bring this into my marriage, little did I know at the time it would for a small while bring to both of a separation of two varying levels.
Let’s look at the metaphor, yet keep it really simple. In the boat metaphor there is the Captain who we will call Capatanee, and the first Mate, who we will call the first Matree.
We will give her a more feminine name and the Captain a sexier Italian name. The Capatanee and the first Matree meet, sparks fly and the energy connection between the two is felt on a very deep level 3 love level.
The old fluttering of the heart which feels wonderful and enticing, you feel totally worthy because this person is taking a great interest in your well being.
The relationship develops over 18 months to 2 years with a whirl wind of romance and excitement. Then what happens is each other gets to know the other person really well, they understand to a degree the other person’s needs or they think they do. They know how the other person ticks so to speak on the surface level. Because the relationship is in its infancy many of the emotional needs are being met in the relationship.
It is now apparent and we know that the honey moon period finishes around the second year mark and this is the pivotal time when the relationship moves to another level of love that is based in developing unconditional love from both corners.
This love is very different from the honey moon love as its roots reach deeper into the core of the human being. It is a love based in giving to giving love no matter what challenges come into the relationship.
This is the point of any relationship where it is becoming aware that your partner has different wants and needs from yours at times and that you are both wired completely different too. The fun about this is working out your partners wiring and seeing their personality come alive when you are giving them through communication what they need.
It only needs one side to start, yet patience and persistence is the key because it will not happen overnight, yet it will happen with practice.
This does not mean at all that you are not suited. What this means is that Men and Women are wired differently and once your partner wiring is understood you can build a relationship on complete and total giving to give love.
This kind of love is divine in its attributes where the relationship feels like it is in complete flow. There are also times when you just feel complete absolute love for them just growing from your heart space as you look at them because love really is that simple.
When you have this kind of love you want more of it and yes it is very addictive who wouldn’t not want to develop it into the best it could be. It is in our nature to love and give more and in doing so we feel the magic like a complete miracle shining on life. In some cases though a complete detox of the relationship for established ones need to be administered first. This brings about a complete cleanse, and it is like it is almost like a brand new relationship even if you have been with your partner for 20 odd years.
This is the time when we need to really start understanding the generic makeup and wiring of our Man or our Women. This is where we start to realise that there is more than 1 personality established in the human being. This is the child, the adult, and Mum and Dad. Yes a scary thought, although true. Many of our core beliefs we established and learnt between 0-7 today and we are still playing out them out now in our relationships.