Relationship Communication – how to get the best out of your relationships

Communication is probably one of your favorite subjects-and so it should be.  After all, we humans are herd animals.   We belong in communities and function so much better when we do.

We thrive on relationships that need to communicate.  Yet communication has had a tough ride during the 1970’s through to the 21st century.  The relentless changes of the past thirty years have had the effect of breaking down many of our traditional groups and isolating us from each other. One example of this is the mining industry and the controversial saga over the millions lost through mental health issues, although that is another blog in itself.

It is definitely true that our personal relationships have often been the result of social, economic and technological change.  This has been a time of re-definition of everything from gender roles of marriage and divorce, and a constant introduction of new technology which inevitably does shape the way we live and communicate.

I know for me it has been a big leap into a new dimension of understanding, and not always welcomed as I felt very safe in the old way I was communicating. Non-change I thought, would be so much easier because I knew it so well and it was sometimes working and sometimes it wasn’t.

Although this old way of communicating is now very outdated and the new technology is giving us an advance awareness of higher understanding and quicker outcomes and solutions through new strategic interventions.

These powerful interventions can be seen through the Robbins-Madanes Coaching School (RMT) which I am a part of.  Also Anthony Robbins is a well known and Cleo Madanes is a leading pioneer in her psychotherapy relationship training.  They have opened the world to the massive benefits we can receive if we are just able to take responsibility for the way we communicate in our relationships.

While we have been struggling to keep up with these evitable changes, it has been easy to forget that the most precious resource we have for coping with life’s stressful and unstable times is the resource of our personal relationships.  The thing we need of course is each other, which is the most important aspect of human communication.  Without each other we would not survive this is a fact.

If the time has come to start placing more emphasis on the quality of our relationships, and giving more attention to the life of our families, friends, social groups, work groups and neighbours- then the time has certainty arrived to nurture our communication. Hence these blogs and the creation of my website www.mindplumbing.com.au and my model ‘Stratagem.’

Most of us learn our communication from our families, although outside information from outside sources would actually take up a grand scale of reinforcing our faulty beliefs as we grow older.

Our parents teach us the broader lessons that lay the foundations on how we treat each other.  We also learn what degree of responsibility is applicable to our relationships, which we have already gained from a young age.

Of course these broader lessons that lay the foundations for life learning are rarely spoken about, because it is felt that they don’t need to be made implicit, and this is really the old communication and how it functioned within society.

These lessons become obvious from the way our families behave within the greater span of events and situations.

In truth family life isn’t all sweetness and light.  In fact, when you’re in the middle of one, and I know you understand what I mean here, a family can feel anything but sugary.

And like my own childhood growing up it left a sour taste in my pallet in regards to communication.  In fact in my own childhood I became a non-communicator to protect the safety of myself.

Although to this day I thank my family significantly as they have become my greatest advocates for my changes and for me taking responsibility to mastering my own communicating skills.  They were really my greatest teachers.

All families can be gloomy families, sometimes, and that is something that is probably just as well, after all this can be a blessing as the family is not the only place where we learn about acceptance, patience, unconditional love, and forgiveness.  It is like any flip side of a coin, we also learn about adversity, conflict, and compromise.

If families are functioning properly, the big pay-off for society is that children will have already learned many of these lessons before they are unleashed on the community.  This is one of the things that I mean when I said that the family is a social unit.

Family, relationships, and communication within your self will figure prominently in my writings and I would like to introduce them to you as well as the tools to help you grow and develop within society and your family unit.

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